Subscribe

Disabled Dreamer

Author: Nicole Kinzel

  • How Did I Poem

    Part of me simply does not understand. I could list every step I took. Logic followed like the flow of a river. Reasoning explained and justified to you and myself. But that river feels like it runs apart from me. A story about a dream or character. *** How did I get here? I understand…

  • Reset Poem

    The sun filters in through the blinds. It should be a beautiful day. I wish I could feel it. The sun is lovely on my skin but not what I need right now. The day might be right, But I am not. *** What I need is a reset. I cannot match the pace of…

  • Surgery Update

    I made it through surgery without significant complications. That being said, I am in very significant pain. The articles I read online, saying that the surgery does not hurt a lot are liars. I absolutely do not recommend getting a double mastectomy unless you have no better options. I cannot move my arms and the…

  • Surgery Time

    Posting early today since I will be undergoing an operation. As some long time followers know, I have extensive history with breast tumors. I have had four removed previously: two removed under general anesthesia and two under local. They are chronic benign tumors caused by estrogen sensitivity. That means they could happen until menopause. They…

  • A Different Me Poem

    I will always remember that night. The slow drip of the secondary shower head. It had been leaking from the hard water for years. The warm glow of the ceiling light made the water shine in a muted way. I was used to seeing it reflecting the early morning sun through the two frosted windows…

  • Wind Chimes Poem

    Lullaby carried to me on a clear tone. Whispers of freedom gold. Seen in the way sun beams reflect onto nearby walls. Sanctuary separate from everyday life. You can feel it too can’t you? Your heart longs for it. *** Talisman of perfect calm. The same kind found in the ocean air and seaglass. There…

  • Woe to You Poem

    Woe to you that can only relate to yourself. Nostalgia your only functional drug. Forever getting high off your own supply. I know how little you have left to obsess over. There never seems to be anything new to you. It is kind of sad how little you have just to try and fill the…

  • Not All Bad Poem

    I know it hurts. You are back in your shell of protection. Sequestered away until you know you feel better. That better day could be tomorrow or in the distant future. You will hold on until you do not have to anymore. It is not all bad though. *** Not everyone handles pain well. Lashing…

  • Little Jingle Poem

    Sometimes I forget that life is not supposed to have a soundtrack. I go about my day with a tune in my mind. It can take all I have to even just turn down the volume. Diving through my head like a lost songbird. Easier to make it use a different sound than silence completely.…

  • Just Ordinary Poem

    I would not mind if you became my ordinary. Not an insult hidden in plain sight. I just could never be tired of you. Never meant you are not special. Common to me is not the same as common to you. There is beauty in the ordinary as well. *** Ordinary is the pink in…