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Disabled Dreamer

Author: Nicole Kinzel

  • She Dreamt

    She dreamt a dream that night. That did not fade with the light. Removal of gloom. An empty room. She dreamt that death was not the end. That there are some bad things that good could offend. Dark mark removed. Good ending assumed.

  • Not So Bad

    If this were all a dream, It would not be so bad. Pain gone with a sigh. Lit by the soft neon glow of a night light. Wrapped up somewhere uniquely safe. *** But not this life. Maybe the next. For memories last longer than a dream, And pain is strong enough to break through…

  • Alive Somehow

    I know I have been absent for a VERY long time. It was probably a little over half a year ago that I stopped regularly posting, and for that, I owe an explanation. I have been experiencing increasingly severe symptoms in multiple body systems. Headache, abdominal pain, blood pressure, insomnia, and more. And the most…

  • She Who Slept

    She tried every night. Pulling back to that place of solitude. Where pain could not reach. To where there were no secrets to keep. Watched over by a blanket of eternal stars. *** She tried in order to connect. To match that eternal love. Sometimes, to dare and whisper a dream. Hope to ask for…

  • Where I’ve Been

    I owe everyone an explanation for my abrupt take off and infrequent posting. I have felt off and fatigued for months. Barely able to concentrate on a focused task. All of it culminated in a sudden ER trip very recently. My oxygen levels dropped to 89% and blood pressure went sky high. While I was…

  • Tired of Dreaming Poem

    The moon always comes again. Yet I have run out of feelings to feel. These days I only wake to sad vibes. Trying to live when those dreams bring more comfort. Like a delayed hug from the past. Yet, I’m tired of dreaming. *** I just want to live. Not holding on until yet another…

  • I Never Thought

    I never thought it would be so. Distant as a childhood story. Temporary as a sad song. A trait that belongs to someone else. *** I never thought it would be so. I knew it lurked ahead. I just hoped it would not. Imaginary as that monster under the bed. *** I never thought it…

  • Dear Father

    Oh dear dad, I hate that I am so attached even though you are never around. Excited over the tiniest scrap of attention. It never pans out but all you have to do is smile to set me right back to square one. How is a person supposed to heal from this situation? Forever mourning…

  • Forbidden Hour

    There is something strange about that time. That period between activity and sleep. Where my heart is splayed open. Audience of one. No mercy given for poor actors. Reality fallen out of time. Felt like I saw the light a year ago or was it a second? Funny how it can take the dark to…

  • Long Ride Poem

    This is just one big road trip I never planned. Been here. Been there. Been where you are. Been where my headlights are the only light under the cloud covered night. Funny how the stars almost never shine when you are alone. I did not start out as the driver, sometimes still not. Asleep in…