Saudade is waking up in the morning as a child.

The gentle sound of mourning doves streaming through the cracks in the blinds as well as the golden sun.

Weekends filled with boredom and hopes of the future.

Dreams reflected in the shapes of the clouds and the blue of sky.

No ties to the past beyond the occasional homework assignment.

A time that will never truly come again.

***

Saudade is the alternative places I might be.

Decisions that might have been made differently to grow a branch that grew more fruit.

People that might have grown when they remained stunted.

The erasure of scars that currently limit me.

Ways where I could be just a little bit further.

The better places I could have ended up.

***

Saudade is all the thoughts of the future.

Things that could and could never be.

Dreams that will remain locked outside of reality.

Lives I have have lived but have never been looked back on at the end.

Glowing wisps of dreams that I still cling to.

And all else that will be lost to the tide.