Once when I was little, I sat in a pool safely on my mother’s lap. My younger sister was swimming contentedly at the deep end. It looked so easy.

“I think I can swim. I want to try,” I state confidently.

“No you can’t,” my mom replied with zero hesitation. “Your contractures are too bad.”

I had kicked my way around the pool before. Legs crossed at the ankles like a dolphin tail. I could get quite a bit of power behind it. Couldn’t I just do that? I could figure it out.

“I can do it,” I state again. “All I have to do is push off. Watch me.”

“Alright, go ahead and try. I really don’t think this will go the way you think it will though,” she relented.

My mom unwrapped her arms from around my lower abdomen where she had been securing me to herself. I perched on the pool step I had been on for a few seconds. I had been acting brave but now that I had made up my mind, it seemed scary. I wanted to succeed but was not confident.

After hyping myself up I suddenly pitched myself forward and pushed off with my legs. Very quickly I found myself head and face down in the water slowly sinking. I forced panic down and crossed my legs and kicked. That did not help. If anything, the blue wavy pool bottom seemed even closer now. I really started to panic now and began to flail in my weak way.

Before my panic rose further, I felt a familiar pair of arms grab me by the sides. Mom corrected my orientation and pulled me up to safety. I sputtered out water in surprise. My heart raced and I shook a little. Not that I was ever in real danger. Even with my reaction and failure, I was not chided for trying. Not a single “I told you so” left my mother’s mouth.

This is an example of both good parenting and good personal exploration. Even if my mom (correctly) knew that I could not swim, I had been allowed to try. I tested my limits for myself and came out with better knowledge of myself. I would not be left with the “what if” line of thought as I wondered if I was missing out.

Limit testing has been valuable in many other parts of my life. It has helped reaffirm my current limits as my strength wanes and taught me to improvise when I am met with failure. I am made a better person by it. Life is maximized to the absolute boundaries I am bound by. I would not have it any other way.