I was in 6th grade when boredom started an issue that would snowball into something much worse. I was made to still attend physical education class at that point for who knows why. I would be asked to even change into a PE shirt even though I could do exactly none of the exercises that the rest of the class did. Because I was given nothing else to do, I often ended up messing with left out equipment such as jump ropes, hula hoops, and basketballs. This day I ended up trying to play with a basketball. It was something I had done before multiple times. I would push it around the empty gym with my wheelchair while kids exercised outside and my attendant watched from the bottom step of the bleachers. What I did not know however, was that the particular ball I was playing with was underinflated. As I attempted to push it back to the the equipment closet it acted as a wedge under my wheelchair base. I watched my world suddenly tilt and before I realized what had happened, I was was on my side on the ground but still strapped into my wheelchair. The female PE teacher heard the crash and after realizing that she couldn’t lift my wheelchair herself, went and got the male PE teacher in charge of the boys. He used brute strength to right me. I didn’t pass out but I had hit my head on the ground and my footrest had landed on my foot. The female teacher took me to the office in a furious mood while I cried. It seems silly in retrospect for her to be mad at me for an accidental self injury but I believe it was more anger at the situation than anything else. I believe she realized how bad it would look if I had been maimed while being pretty much unattended and left with just a (temporary at the time) school aid.

I remember sitting in the nurses’ office with the nurse urging me to stay awake since all I wanted to do was rest with my eyes closed after both adrenaline and upset wore off. I also had my shoe taken off the foot I landed on because it hurt so much. I had worn green crocs that day. My mom drove me to the hospital almost immediately to get me checked. My head was mentioned and my foot as well. An xray was taken of my foot but my bones are tiny to begin with. Fractures and breaks can be difficult to see. It hurt so badly to position it for the xray that I cried again. Both my head and foot were examined by a doctor. After looking at my foot and feeling it in a few areas he told me “you would be in more pain if it was broken”. Despite my complaints, I was sent home with a clean bill of health.

Over the next while I continued to complain about pain whenever my foot was manipulated or hung free. A little over a month later I came down with the swine flu. That deserves it’s own post but I ended up in ICU for nine days. During that stay, a wonderful male doctor noticed me still complaining about pain while doing his rounds. He got my history on my foot and ordered a bed xray for my foot. It was discovered then that my ankle was in fact broken the entire time. My foot was stabilized with an ace bandage for the time being.

On my discharge day I was was referred to get a cast. The problem was that it had been untreated for so long that it had begun to heal badly. They tried to correct it and I cried and sobbed. They begun to discuss re breaking it. Of course a little kid wants anything but that so I pleaded for anything but that. The caster looked at me and then at my father. He then said to his assistant “She is non ambulatory so it doesn’t matter if it’s straight or not”. With the threat of pain being gone I was relieved. It was only later that I realized how messed up that statement was. The pain statement from the initial doctor was about as bad as well. In any case, I was casted as is. I needed surgery years later because of positional pressure complications but that also needs a separate post.

This experience taught me two things. The first of which was doctors don’t always take an increased pain tolerance into account. I have been though many surgeries and illnesses. My pain tolerance is on a scale of extremes because of it. I either have an “I’m still OK” mindset or “I can’t handle it” mindset. There is almost no in between. It is an ongoing process to this day to learn to advocate my pain to doctors. The doctor should have gotten a second opinion on my xrays or examined them more closely considering my disability and listened to my complaints even if I didn’t seem to be in enough pain. The second thing I learned is some technicians or doctors take my disability as an opportunity to take shortcuts. I was entitled to the same level of treatment even if they didn’t think it necessary. My life and future quality of life was just assumed. The role of a healthcare professional is to not assume and to act in the best interest of the patient. I was too young to advocate for myself and my father didn’t want to put me through a bone break after being seriously sick for nine days.

Anyone that has a similar experience, please stand up for yourself and demand proper treatment. Listen to your body and seek treatment even if you are worried about being wrong or a problem. If it’s too late to stand up for yourself, know it’s not your fault. It certainly helps to advocate but it is on the hospital to treat you properly.